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Ready for another real-life lesson in money management? Us too!
We’re glad you’re here with us on this journey to figure out how to actually make our money work, or at least give it our best shot!
A few days after our first meeting with our financial coach, I (Dawn) made a rare purchase for myself: a new shirt from Lululemon. To give you some context, I hadn’t bought any new clothing in over a year. I spent a solid 15 minutes in the store debating whether this one shirt was worth it. I feel as though I am intentional about every clothing decision I make, hence the obnoxiously long internal debate… In the end, I decided yes, it looked great, and made me feel confident. But this shirt led to our first real argument about money since starting Project Money.
I came home excited to show Marco. I felt good about my decision and proud of how I’d approached the purchase. But to him, it felt like money that should have gone toward paying down debt. I was hurt. I’d considered the impact, made what I felt was a responsible choice, and it felt like he didn’t trust my judgment. The conversation quickly escalated. Our communication broke down, emotions ran high, and I eventually left the room. I told him that if Project Money meant I wouldn’t be trusted when making a decision like this, I wasn’t sure I wanted to keep going.
Don’t worry, there’s a happy ending! After we both had some time to cool off, Marco came to me and apologized. He admitted that he hadn’t stopped to consider how his reaction might affect me emotionally. He had been focused solely on the numbers and stuck in “logic mode.” Remember our last blog post when we talked about financial trauma? Marco said that he now realizes that he does have a complicated relationship with money, and even though he didn’t have the right immediate response to my shirt, he knows I’m just as responsible and intentional about how I spend. We’re partners, and we both need space to live our lives while working toward financial freedom.
We haven’t come up with a perfect solution yet, but we’re thinking about maybe adding a “fun money” line in our budget, giving each of us a set amount to spend guilt-free each month. Stay tuned as we work through that with our Project Money coach, Jess, as our mediator.
Moral of the story? Balance. We’re not trying to make a temporary change; we’re trying to make a lifestyle change. That means learning to handle the emotional aspect of money, not just the numbers. Sometimes, you won’t have the answers right away. That’s okay. What matters is being willing to ask for help and work through the challenges together.
Thanks for following along! We’re learning in real time, and we’re so grateful to have you with us as we navigate both the numbers and the emotions tied to them. Here’s to progress, partnership, and finding the balance that works.
Want more guidance on having honest money talks? Check out this helpful article from Summit Credit Union on how to have those tough conversations about money: Positive and Productive Financial Conversations Let’s keep learning and growing together! Marco and Dawn
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